Uploading 1st part out of 5 parts video, will upload rest 4 parts in some time
In the female partners of male cross-dressers, Catharine Lumby sees the basis of an enduring love which confounds stereotypes.
Transvestite Wives is the opposite of the BBC fare I remember from a childhood in which we were only allowed to watch educational fodder.
A distinct genre within those 'approved' programs was socially worthy docos which, in a quietly pompous and concerned manner, 'explored' the life of the working class, the exotic, or the troubled. They were always voiced in an earnest David Attenborough manner.
Transvestite Wives would probably have been a bridge to far in the 1960s. But it's easy to imagine what earnest docomakers might have made of the subject matter. The shame. The pain. The fundamental rent in the psycho-sexual fabric caused by these couples.
Well, welcome to the 21st century. Global warming is a bitch. But at least mainstream filmmakers are able to tackle subjects like cross-dressing without blithely dividing the world into the 'normal' and the freakish.
The real subject of this documentary are the women who are happily partnered with transvestites. It's an under-explored terrain. Men who cross-dress are still the subject of prejudice, ignorance and fear.
Common sense dictates that transvestites are closet gays in urgent need of a sex change. The reality is very different and far more diverse, as this insightful, thoughtful and empathetic documentary shows.
We meet Sam and Chris/Rachel in Nottingham. Sam is taking Chris/Rachel to get his/her nails done.
Asked about her relationship with Chris, Sam says: "Mainstream things bore me so the trannie thing for me is perfect. Normal guys burp and watch football." Sam is warm, attractive and happens to be significantly younger than Chris/Rachel.
Sheila and Dennis have both been married before. Says Sheila, reflecting on the first year of their marriage: "He really was a macho man as far as I knew at the time… but then he started getting very moody."
Particularly poignant is Dennis's admission that he thought he could 'purge' his urge to cross-dress. "It started to become overpowering… Sheila's initial reaction was a mixture of upset… she felt somehow she wasn't satisfying me in her marriage".' Their solution was to let Sheila control how Denise (Denis's feminine persona) emerged.
Reflecting on his urge to cross-dress, Dennis says that sometimes its not there at all but that sometimes the desire to transform is so strong "it's almost painful." Like many transvestites, he's been cross-dressing since childhood.
Robyn was born in Chicago and moved to the UK to be with her first husband. She's a big girl. Her first husband, she says, tried to control her. "He was ashamed of me… he couldn't cope with my size or the way I was."
Then she met her second husband out socialising. He was dressed as Diane. Says her new partner: "You can be the figure of Kate Moss but if you've no personality what's the point. She's great to cuddle. She's a great girl."
A theme that emerges for the women as much as for the men is that they've all found partners who love them as they are – which is surely the real secret to all happy long-term relationships.
And it's this focus on the relationships between the men and women which is ultimately the most compelling part of this modest but beautifully judged piece of filmmaking.
Global Fund to award grant to fight HIV, AIDS among MSM in South Asia - Xinhua
